Bros before hoes, sort of

You gotta appreciate the biggest gang in the world known deceitfully as a religion. Yeah, Islam may be a lot of things, but religion ain’t one of them. Other than that, joining the cult sure comes with lots of perks. Like, other perpetually sexually frustrated retarded sand monkeys having your back (sometimes literally apart from figuratively, but, hey, we all have to make sacrifices sometimes).

In today’s prime example of human retardation we have a metaphorical case of the gang-mentality¬† ‘bros before hoes’ motto. Except, the ‘hoe’ was the Camel Stuffer’s own sister, who got sold into prostitution several times after she turned 12 by her own relatives. The nerve of that child! To allow herself to get kidnapped, trafficked and raped and ruin the family’s honor like that! Good thing brother dearest stepped up and fixed things like a ‘good Muslim’ (haha, get it?)

Women:0 – Logic:1

In a shocking new turn of events the bat-shit crazy broad, who swung at a bouncer in Liverpool and took a punch like Rhianna in her happier Chris Brown days, has come out on Twitter as a model and a victim of terrible wrongdoing. Gulp, gulp. We did NOT see that one coming (edit: we’re just messing with ya. Yeah, we did!). The deluded blob is relying on the 69th Amendment – her right to claim ‘manhandling’ as something that exists every time little Miss Spoilt doesn’t get her way. In this case, she says it was him who “started the altercation, having dragged her out of the club by the leg when she got up and danced on a table“. So, she was just defending her drunken honor to act like every bit the public nuisance that she was and assaulting a man, who was just doing his job, was part of it. Sure, honey, in Snowflakeville – that may make sense, but in the real world when you act like a crazy menstrual sack of shit – You’re Gonna Have a Bad Time.

Equality is a bitch, ladies. Just like you are. Get used to it!

On a scale of 1 to 10, you’re negro as fuck

What you gonna do after shooting a person and posting the video to your Facebook page? The answer is easy if you’re a negro – go to a McDonald’s Drive Tru, of course!

Steve Nobel Laureate for Niggerness Stephens confirmed every stereotype for black people imaginable when he murdered another negro and then had a craving for some good ole fried chicken. Generations of criminologists and Black Lives Matter delusionists will for years retrace his final steps, questioning, wondering what was going through the mind of this monumentally retarded Americoon. Or they can save themselves the trouble and a lot of taxpayers’ funding and check out his last words before driving off to pop a cap in his own motherfuckin’ skull, which were ‘I need my McNuggets!’.

No, we are not even kidding. How great is that?

Serena’s pregnant? Sure…

Fans have taken to Twitter to express their disbelief at the transgender monstrosity that is Serena Williams announcing he’s “20 weeks pregnant“. They just can’t fathom how this could be since “she has been showing off a flat tummy on social media in the past few weeks. “

Let us spell it out for you dickheads – she is a HE and HE is NOT pregnant because that would be im-po-ssi-ble. Let that sink in..

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Things are pretty normal in Fresno

White folk are gonna go nuts over a teensy, tiny accident in Fresno that saw a black man shouting ‘Allahu Akbar’ after ranting on social media how he ‘hated white people’ check the privilege of 3 random white men on the street. Well, he actually shot and killed them, but the police have announced the alleged crime had ‘nothing to do with terrorism in spite of the statement he made.’ You know, cause shouting ‘God is GreatER’ in Arabic is just something everyone does at some point during the day…

Shit White People Do

Another teenager on an idyllic family outing bit the dust. Well, actually, it was the shark that did the biting. But this is getting out of hand. It’s as if, almost, people were NOT intended to swim/surf in shark-infested waters. Who would have guessed?!

Well, at least they’re going to “keep Wylie Bay Beach closed today and surfers have been warned to stay away for at least the next 48 hours” ’cause, you know, there won’t be any sharks in the water after that time, like, ever again.

Thank God it was a white person that died this time. Imagine if animals started committing hate crimes too..

Dancing yourself gay

For years, they’ve been trying to convince us that ballet dancing is just as manly activity as anything else like lumbering, mining coal or providing for your family. Yeah, sure. There’s nothing more natural than a dude dangling his sack in a pair of tight leggings in your face skipping like My Little Pony and jamming to the tune of a 16/17/1800s classic.

As if being a male ballet dancer wasn’t gay enough – now, one dude decided to up the ante. Snip, snap and the dick holding him back was gone and he could embrace his split personality and live a happy life of mental disease in a society that enables that kind of wack shit.

Today I’m thankful for…

An Islamic group in Sydney has confirmed what we’ve been knowing for decades – that Muslim folk have a serious issue with basic human concepts like right, wrong, no-nos and do-dos. We feel compelled to expand on their poignant description of domestic abuse. You know what else is a ‘beautiful blessing’?

  • Borders
  • Deportation
  • Institutes for the Mentally and Criminally Insane
  • Chemical Castration
  • Ham Sandwiches

 

I got 99 problems, but racism ain’t one

Just a negro ranting about racism getting in the way of his stealing shit and stuff…

edit: $1 000 000 idea of the week: Have each and every SJW/feminist/libertarian/nutjob adopt a nigglet – nurture it, love it, let it suck off their liberal, non-judgemental, atheist, self-important bosom to become the fully-formed parasite that it can be. Then keep it the hell away from the rest of civilized people.