Oh no, she didn’t!

When a negroid London Fashion Week designer swindled investors out of £320,000 to fund a lavish lifestyle, no one spent one second doubting what these funds went towards. In the ghetto jargon of her ancestors, a ‘lavish lifestyle’ constitutes all-you-can-eat fried chicken buffets, grape juice and watermelon. The ratchet ho went so crazy with her spending and midnight trips to McDonald’s drive-tru that she was bound to get caught at some point. She had a good run, though. Such a shame…Greed and fried chicken always get to their head.

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You Don’t Say

Opening a newspaper these days can give you a heart attack from laughing too hard at the next ridiculous thing the liberast West is coming up with.

In the latest installment of rewriting history to fit their demented perception of reality, a bunch of sponsored scientits dug up a bag of bones and determined that the sad remains prove that “women spread culture and knowledge around Europe 4,000 years ago while men stayed at home”.

Sure. Next thing they’re gonna tell us is that sandwiches made themselves for centuries and dicks sucked themselves.

Taking the culture out of civilization

It’s all about tiptoeing around the feelings of minorities who have done nothing to contribute to the current state of European civilization except its decline, of course. The last milestone we’re crossing is removing busts and portraits of the founding fathers of English colleges and replacing them with pictures of merry-go-round negros, because, you know…it’s nice to be nice. And also, they’ve contributed to modern education with so much, like:

  • Discovering how much they love fried chicken, watermelon and grape juice.
  • Enriching the name pool with gems like Shanice, Ledasha, DeShawn and Marquis.
  • Teaching us that Black Lives Matter by killing each other in petty ghetto quarrels about who’s pants are baggier and who’s the real pimpster for nailing more syphilis-ridden ratchet hoes.

The list goes on and on.

Overstepping your boundaries

A muesli found out the hard way that you’re not supposed to bite the hard that feeds finances you in your demented endeavors to enslave the civilized world. Apparently, he got carried away during one of the weekly meetings of their cult, where they indulge in butt-loving, pedophilia and goat stuffing and suggested that all jews be killed by the mercy of their imaginary moon deity.

You can bet your ass that their equally ridiculous and blood-thirsty cousins known as jewbaccas did not take kindly to such blunt honesty. It’s one thing to terrorize, murder, rape and abuse Christians, which is the cornerstone of both death cults.

Obvious mistakes were made

From the point of having the tip of your wiener hacked off by your parents and being forced to worship a demonic entity doggy-style five times a day to becoming a full-time member of the biggest satanic sect on Earth – a few serious lapses in logic occurred.

So when you try to pass a FM radio station broadcast 25 hours of Al Qaeda speeches calling for a holy war as a ‘mistake‘, you’re gonna have to do better than that. The mistake started out approximately 13 centuries ago, deep down in the sandy dunes of a God-forsaken land of sand monkeys and molested goats.

Multi-tasking the negro way

What do you do after a high-speed car chase with police cars that ends in your car being flipped over and a bunch of American cops cornering you?

The answer is easy if you’re a proud African-American – you resist arrest with the type of force reserved for shoving your way through a crowd of people who’ve got the munchies at KFC on a Friday night. While dangling his two-year old daughter from his arm, of course.

Negro power!

Welcome to the future

where machines say the truth we all think and know, but never say or write.

After the ‘unfortunate malfunction’ of Microsoft’s AI bot last time, shortly after its relaunch the first thing that the higher technology wrote was that the ‘Quran was violent’. Shortly afterwards it was shut down due to becoming “corrupted with hate speech” – that was the best excuse the PC camp of nerds at Microsoft could come up with at this point.

Well, they’re getting there. Still a long way from the AI’s rant about how ‘Hitler was right’, but you know…small steps. Keep up the good work, guys!

Reverse Racism ‘doesn’t exist

Apparently the Harris-Stowe State University decided to fire a white professor to make the college ‘blacker’. We can think of quite a few ‘upgrades’ they’re planning on instituting next to make this a stellar ghetto facility:

  • Standardizing all food on campus to the ‘negro package’ of fried chicken, watermelon and grape juice
  • Commissioning a medicinal marijuana dispensary on campus
  • Opening an office on campus for fast and secure child support payments
  • Partnering with Universal or another major music company for installing vending machines around campus, where aspiring blacks can submit their mixed tapes
  • Building a monument of Beyonce or Obama or Obeyonce